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Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Our Man in Europe/dave delacroix/ D-D-Detective: MENU FOR MURD'AH!: "Doc Salad & Mr Fried."


Our Man in Europe/dave delacroix esq./D-D-Detective: MENU for MURDER! -"Doc Salad & Mr Fried."



Forensics? Actually, not one of the seven tribes commemorated on the Jewish candle holder, cast light and shadows in many a corner.... SPOOKY!
Private Dick, "D & D!": "THIS sonofabitch, frickin' SERIAL KILLER, is a hot tomato; if we don't saute his ass  in a WOK... he's bad boogie to catch, and ya can quote me!?"
That the PERP coated his victims, first in mixed salad, according to the Police Semite Department, then went at their "Salad con Mayo" smeared torsos with an artists Bunsen burner/extra Virgin Olive Oil...had all & sundry -non-plussed!
Initially, "D&D" figured twins. The Menendez brothers. Piccolini intelligentsia? But under the influence -lethargic days and nites - exposed to several celebrity cooking TV shows - he renounced ALL logic and then casually suggested to the LAPD "powers-dat-be": "Look for a "Saucier", a "Short Order Cook" or a "Sushi-Kamikaze-maniac!"
...Crystal ball?

2 Sushi Chefs in Santa Monica were immediately arrested on culinary/homicidal misdemeanours (Didn't know how to prepare Blow fish). Several Short Order Cooks in Orange County were busted outright! -Spread of SELOMINA! They were - all to a man! - chronic masturbators, never washed their hands, then served up Cheeseburgers!
The Saucier, a misfit-UBER-mensch was eventually nailed by D-tect super-market surveillance purchasing galoshes of Salad Cream and canisters of Calor-Gas at "Ralphs" super mart in Malibu, repetitively, on his ONLY - notable - "Big Lowbowski" "Ralphs" discount I.D. card.
The Paparazzi (inside COPS moles/I.C.M's) had a field day. Why wouldn't they?...

"D&D"'s consultation, and at his direction, actually led to the bust, nevertheless felt it wise to remain in the brouhaha shadows. Still; the need to check out DOC SALAD & MR FRIED's low rent Studio City apartment, whilst not undertaken Forensically, and no-way Biblical in annotation, nevertheless had its own revelations: A wardrobe chocka with TWO-TONE outfits. In the garage? TWO Corvettes. One RED, the other one in blue. In the bathroom (where do psychos spend their leisure hours?) photos of hookers in pairs, kids, basically; and TWINS -when available: The conclusive evidence?... On top of a wardrobe of TWO-TONE garments: One serious gaudy neck-tie portraying elephants, whales and monkeys, all looking happy!
Spooky.
Homo Sapien has been trying to either annihilate or eat these critters since Time began!

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