D & D -Detective: "The GORGONZOLA MAN."

D & D Detect: "The Gorgonzola Man."


NEVER KISS a man/woman with Facial Herpes... Usually en-crusted in the crevices of their mouths?... Discreet, re-mote Colonies strewn around the planet play host to these UN-thinking/frivolous scarred folks. Bloody ISLANDS of them! Some, Pacific: BIKINI ATOLL. Some, decidely frigid: ANTHRAX Island, Scotland. Every day a ferry arrives, off-loads its Cold Sore sufferers... Old Island Hands, faces blackened by disease, check-off the new arrivals: "Stilton! La Gruyere! Gorgonzola! Sage Derby, gone to seed! WHOA!!! ROQUEFORT MAN!"

D & D had read about these Gastronomic Exiles in some Periodical, probably edited by Food-Czar, Tony "Anthony" Boudain who, except  from a short bout of "Blue Squid Rash", had largely escaped most negatives of the "Holy Cucina."

The GORGONZOLA MAN? -Anyone who has ever accepted a FREE Cheese Cookie on the Santa Monica cliff-side board-walk, need not read further, excepting to say, this particular SERIAL KILLER had a lot in common with Sweeney Todd.
Sweeney T. Barber/Frieseur-dude, who cropped clients heads a might too close, took their heads completely off then made MEAT PIES with the bodies  in his Fleet Street, London basement to an in-delicate profit?

The GORGONZOLA MAN? That Cheese Salad buffet he rented on Santa Monica's 3rd. St. promenade, thankfully,  became Swiss Cheese once D & D scented the Bad Brie!

ZOOT ALLORS (for that was his Punk Rocker "handle" before he was DE-frock ed for playing Rhythm & Blues) was POISONING his fellow Musical-Anarchists of yest-er-year.
Problem WAS, D & D couldn't prove it. No-one could. -For every LETHAL "pannini", the son-of-a-bitch foisted half a dozen  O.K. stale SUBS (Heroes/long sandwiches)....!

"Breaking & Entering" (Burglary) wasn't at ALL D & D's style, but in cahoots with "Lilly-White", CARL BLAKE (Central L.A. Detective and Papa of MISTY, a Zoot Allors Victim), D & D rapidly surveyed ZOOT'S kitchen-Culinary-additives, guessed correctly, and saw to it that Zoot would be hung by his own petard, adding Zoot's elixir to Zoot's own laid out breakfast platter. ERGO! A week later? A GARGOYLE felon, barely distinguishable from the "Creature from the Black Lagoon" with Blue speckles/veins, ranking like a burnt-down Parmesan Cheese factory during mating season), ZOOT took  Merchant ship from San Pedro harbour (Port of Los Angeles) to exile and hell; possibly, no worse off than  - if busted? - 25 to life in CHINO?

And so it goes. Pass the frickin' cheese!...