Our Man in Europe, dave delacroix.... Xockoleekie Soup!
Dead Broads don-t wear TARTAN. Everybody knows THAT cept Uncle Ernie, ya dog Trixie, but as....for HAGGIS.... Wee talking Bag-Pipes, Cockaleekee SOUP, getting HIGH on freezing to death on Scottish Highland moors, skinny-dipping in frozen LOCHS...in YA KILT, no Sporran!...And killing your CELEB L.A. Brentwood Village, next door to O.J.-s murder-platz, with a SKEE UN DU...old Bowie knife....wotchagonnaDO!
DnD, lost Kids and Found Detective Agy, lost for Lunch, plain out of domestic Scotch, Weed, Groceries, whatever but sometimes Crime-Celeb got talked into SYNOPSIS of the O.J. quagmire. Speaking into the MICROPHONE in Brentwood- murder--situ with foreign Scottish=Highland BBC Production Duet...THEY got distracted by the sound of Bagpipes next door. Whilst THEY fled in their homeophophbic-Kilt direction DnD sagged to his knees for a needy Smoke and greedily eyed the bar-patio-smoker-friendly Brentwood Plastic friendly hostelry AWAR the, er, boulevard jammed packed with Hollywood wannabees. Dreams of watered down Bloody Mary-s! It was a hot day.
Anyhow the Jacobyte-kilted Film Crew soon AW DAH NAE seeking his immediate counsel after a slaving 10 minute-lip smacking-salviating, not wishing to disturb the evidence, but some, whossit-filming... had righteously alerted 411, or 911, called the Cops in Bags, several Prowl Cars filled with part time REEL ESTATE Agents, and even DETECT SGT. Nalty, who NEVER appears in FILM NOIR under his own name were spread-eagled on the scene of the Boo-ga-loo. And as is LAPD basic-retard Procedure everyone, including the Cafe-Bar Hollyhocks wannabees across the b.l.v.d had to GET ON THE GROUND, PUT...dat...MARTINI...DOWN, quite enjoying acting out a Movie-Gig. Lots a giggles. But Sgt. Nalty spared Dnd. who for a moment felt like a Brentwood V.I.P. albeit a Peter Sellars...whatever THAT gets U.
A quick glance at the crime scene. DnD discreetly mentioned to Sgt. Nalty....incase he missed the obvious...the evidence. Bagpipes in the sink with 2 Guys in TWEED, a high end Loire vin blanc sur la table... One of the Highland dude looking guilty. One bloodied in his nether-kilt-region and dead. And a cauldron of Cockoleekee soup atop a floating sausage-thingy on the boil! Heck! There were still some Leeks on the kitchen carving board!...
The ON THE RESTAURANT PROWL, L.A. film crew showed up but decided they couldnt use the footage.
c.davedelacroix.
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